I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
Dear sober self, your keys are on the table in front of you the only way your typing this is with autocorrect goodnight love you
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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