So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Randomize
