Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
