I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Randomize
