There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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