Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
COCAINE IS GR8
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
Randomize
