I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Awkward medical moment of the day: A very obese girl with a disorder that literally makes her hit herself punched herself in the face. Literally. While screaming 'MCDONALDS MONEY'. Right. Beside. Me.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
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