Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
Randomize
