no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize
