dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
I just took what could be the most awkward shit in my life, which considering my definition of awkward and my experiences shitting, is pretty fucking awkward.
...
I was sitting there doing my business and the guy in the stall next to me banged on the stall and asked me how to spell picnic because he wasn't sure.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
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