Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize
