Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
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