Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (773): View more from Illinois

  i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (773): i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about http://tfl.nu/411c
  Replies (24) Good night (1158) Bad night (756)
• Favorite

  (909): View more from California

  how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (909): how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close? http://tfl.nu/7d45
  Replies (33) Good night (629) Bad night (4162)
• Favorite

  (905): View more from Toronto

  Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (905): Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language http://tfl.nu/v1ob
  Replies (17) Good night (4648) Bad night (692)
• Favorite

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (609): And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS http://tfl.nu/9yrh
  Replies (17) Good night (1274) Bad night (4684)
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (814): i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me http://tfl.nu/y6ou
  Replies (16) Good night (4035) Bad night (1230)
• Favorite

  (704): View more from North Carolina

  Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (704): Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday. http://tfl.nu/1b1a
  Replies (2) Good night (1222) Bad night (923)
• Favorite

  (931): View more from Tennessee

  Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (931): Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this. http://tfl.nu/inch
  Replies (8) Good night (4400) Bad night (966)
• Favorite

  (510): View more from California

  This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?

  (925): View more from California

  Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (510): This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over? (925): Quite the smooth talker. There in 5. http://tfl.nu/ccg0
  Replies (7) Good night (3321) Bad night (684)
• Favorite

  (801): View more from Utah

  He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (801): He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"... http://tfl.nu/bw0v
  Replies (4) Good night (522) Bad night (1035)
• Favorite

  (317): View more from Indiana

  His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (317): His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv http://tfl.nu/yd6c
  Replies (2) Good night (934) Bad night (913)
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (631): Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps http://tfl.nu/unlw
  Replies (2) Good night (453) Bad night (824)
• Favorite

  (859): View more from Kentucky

  Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (859): Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down. http://tfl.nu/u8oc
  Replies (15) Good night (1268) Bad night (440)
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (425): Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat http://tfl.nu/7oyq
  Replies (0) Good night (305) Bad night (519)
• Favorite

  (909): View more from California

  Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (909): Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man http://tfl.nu/x5ba
  Replies (3) Good night (558) Bad night (287)
• Favorite

  (757): View more from Virginia

  I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (757): I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass" http://tfl.nu/b6v5
  Replies (0) Good night (373) Bad night (173)

Randomize