i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
These 25 People Believed Fake Facts For Way Too Long
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
23 Adults Confess The Irrational Fears They Had When They Were Kids
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.