check it out our google latitudes are spooning
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Randomize
