I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
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