his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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