So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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