i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
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