Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
