Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Randomize
