omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
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