literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize
