How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Randomize