I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
