why do cheetos always look like penises
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
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