Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize