i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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