Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Randomize
