I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
I have tasted many bathrooms
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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