We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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