My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
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