So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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