I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
