Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
