I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize