I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Randomize