No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize