S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Randomize
