For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
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If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
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IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
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