Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
being pregnant is like rehab
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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