he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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