They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
25 People Confess The Most Awkward Situation They’ve Ever Been In
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
These Are 21 Of The Most Delusional People Ever
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit