i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
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