Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
Randomize
