I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
