He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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