problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
