Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Randomize