You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
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